Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Just off to bed now .. day spent talking a friend through a bit of a problem .. but things sorted now and the friendship has deepened cause of it. It's taken a while .. because she was a tad homeophobic when we met .. and although she said she's changed her mind totally .. it's taken me quite a while to start really trusting her .. I've kept on wondering if she's gonna change her mind .. regardless of how much she says she likes me etc. Because of her attitude when we first met I've been rather wary .. today I realised that there was no need. She's obviously known that I am rather wary and has tried so hard to put me mind at ease.
We're getting there .. takes time to build a friendship up anyway .. plus we're different generations. but today there's more trust growing. All because someone she was helping .. treated her badly .. he was moaning about being treated badly and then does that ... shakes head in bewilderment!!!!
I told her me last three experiences to cheer her up too .. her partner's had a good one too .. though he was a total skeptic .. big time .. nothing like ur own experiences to change ur mind I guess .. blushes very slightly .. I never had a completely closed mind .. because I always realised that there was a chance logically.
Soon I will discuss it with the other person too .. she sees me as a kind of best friend too .. but I'm not sure how far I want this discussed .. I don't know her friends very well and I'm becoming more wary who I talk about it with ... like most people seem to be .. people often don't even talk about their NDE outside of close family members or very close friends .. let alone any other type of experience along these lines .. and, it sadly seems the better choice .. as I said u don't help people it seems because in general it doesn't make a difference to them .. if they are going to know spirit will be there and if they don't want to know then nothing will change things for them .. whether they know that other people have these experiences or not. Because of their general attitude .. it's what I said earlier on.
I know if I tell this person I am going to hear about a lot of new experiences .. she has a lot of friends .. and my telling mine will start a lot more openning up. I deliberately didn't tell some people a little while ago .. one person there had had a NDE too around an accident .. but, with a couple of exceptions I didn't feel that I had been made to feel very comfortable there .. and didn't really want to share something so personal with them although I knew, in this case, that I would be very welcomed if I did .. I just felt that it should've been like that anyway. Sad .. but there u go .. her sharing her NDE meant a lot to these people but I just didn't feel I was in the right setting to be able to feel comfortable which also meant that I wouldn't've talked about it all very easily anyway .. though, in this particular incidence, all that would've happened would've been that I would've beome a member of the group a lot quicker than usual .. but I didn't feel comfortable with that .. I would've still been exactly the same person who I'd been before telling them .. and that should've been so anyway because I've known them a year .. one person a lot longer than that. Other people have said that they've felt the same about the acceptance thing there .. but it doesn't seem to change their behaviour when someone new comes along!!!!!!!!
That probably needs breaking down into more paragraphs to make it easier to read but I'm so tired.
It's not something to do with age either .. more to do with personality. That goes for the talking about NDEs too along with other things in that line and understanding the effect of the whole .. it has more to do with the person than the experiences!!!!! unless u've had them for yourselves. I was right first time!!!
I'll have to think about it .. I have no trouble talking with the friend I was talking to tonight because I do trust her now .. and her very nice partner has had an experience along these lines too which shocked him at the time beause he like me was very skeptical .. there've been a few in his life .. but one that really stands out .. he's only in his 30s too. But I don't now how keen I am on starting the whole thing rolling again and having to explain everything again .. even though I'll get to hear lots and lots of very interesting stories in return. I'm just not as overcome by it all as I was .. don't have the need to tell everyone I meet almost about some of it .. even though I'm still very keen to hear other people's experiences. Perhaps I feel that I've shared too much or something. After all most people do keep them very much to themselves.
Anyway .. off to bed now.
We're getting there .. takes time to build a friendship up anyway .. plus we're different generations. but today there's more trust growing. All because someone she was helping .. treated her badly .. he was moaning about being treated badly and then does that ... shakes head in bewilderment!!!!
I told her me last three experiences to cheer her up too .. her partner's had a good one too .. though he was a total skeptic .. big time .. nothing like ur own experiences to change ur mind I guess .. blushes very slightly .. I never had a completely closed mind .. because I always realised that there was a chance logically.
Soon I will discuss it with the other person too .. she sees me as a kind of best friend too .. but I'm not sure how far I want this discussed .. I don't know her friends very well and I'm becoming more wary who I talk about it with ... like most people seem to be .. people often don't even talk about their NDE outside of close family members or very close friends .. let alone any other type of experience along these lines .. and, it sadly seems the better choice .. as I said u don't help people it seems because in general it doesn't make a difference to them .. if they are going to know spirit will be there and if they don't want to know then nothing will change things for them .. whether they know that other people have these experiences or not. Because of their general attitude .. it's what I said earlier on.
I know if I tell this person I am going to hear about a lot of new experiences .. she has a lot of friends .. and my telling mine will start a lot more openning up. I deliberately didn't tell some people a little while ago .. one person there had had a NDE too around an accident .. but, with a couple of exceptions I didn't feel that I had been made to feel very comfortable there .. and didn't really want to share something so personal with them although I knew, in this case, that I would be very welcomed if I did .. I just felt that it should've been like that anyway. Sad .. but there u go .. her sharing her NDE meant a lot to these people but I just didn't feel I was in the right setting to be able to feel comfortable which also meant that I wouldn't've talked about it all very easily anyway .. though, in this particular incidence, all that would've happened would've been that I would've beome a member of the group a lot quicker than usual .. but I didn't feel comfortable with that .. I would've still been exactly the same person who I'd been before telling them .. and that should've been so anyway because I've known them a year .. one person a lot longer than that. Other people have said that they've felt the same about the acceptance thing there .. but it doesn't seem to change their behaviour when someone new comes along!!!!!!!!
That probably needs breaking down into more paragraphs to make it easier to read but I'm so tired.
It's not something to do with age either .. more to do with personality. That goes for the talking about NDEs too along with other things in that line and understanding the effect of the whole .. it has more to do with the person than the experiences!!!!! unless u've had them for yourselves. I was right first time!!!
I'll have to think about it .. I have no trouble talking with the friend I was talking to tonight because I do trust her now .. and her very nice partner has had an experience along these lines too which shocked him at the time beause he like me was very skeptical .. there've been a few in his life .. but one that really stands out .. he's only in his 30s too. But I don't now how keen I am on starting the whole thing rolling again and having to explain everything again .. even though I'll get to hear lots and lots of very interesting stories in return. I'm just not as overcome by it all as I was .. don't have the need to tell everyone I meet almost about some of it .. even though I'm still very keen to hear other people's experiences. Perhaps I feel that I've shared too much or something. After all most people do keep them very much to themselves.
Anyway .. off to bed now.
posted by Zeb at 3:58 PM
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