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Got up for a cup og liquorice tea and somr garlic. lol!!! It's cooling now. We were discusiing wanting v needing in griendshipsw and relationships earlier on . Obviously because of what went on on the site. And the freedom of wanting a person in your life because you like/love them but not because you are needy and somewhat dependent on them.



I felt sad when I read what he'd written as did other people discussing the concept .. though sometimes it is difficult to tell just how dependent we are on other people .. but it is nice to be able to say to someone I'm here because I want to be .. because I like you and want you in my life and not because I'm needy and need you there. You can do both at the same time .. want someone there firstly because you like and love them but need them in some ways too .. but it's great to want people in your life because you want them as people you like, love and respect.



I was surprized that he's said what he did .. people there seem to have moved away from the story now .. there was a time when it was being followed as an inspiring love story .. two people being kept apart by illnesses and distance .. lol .. sounds familiar!!! But no-one is responding now .. there's silence.



I can't think what he meant when he said that .. he's ill .. she's a trained carer and I'm sure would've loved to be told that he wanted her as a partner independently of whether he needed her or not .. that's what people usually say. It's a well known romantic idea .. to want someone in your life just because you love them and not because you need them to be there .. for some reason he got it the wrong way round.



Someone said that it didn't sound as if he really meant much of what he said. I don't know .. it's all .. u are the most beautiful woman ever my precious queen of the universe .. beautiful angel of the heavens. And the same goes back the other way .. well, not queen of the universe .. or E would've been right ... lol!!!!



I don't think there's been one hug .. just all these cliches .. with a made up pet name for each other .. they both use the same one.



He says he thinks of her all the time and judging by what he says .. he means ALL the time and not just a lot of the time .. he also tells her that having her in his life keeps him from going down with the illnesses .. which is really needing and putting a lot of responsibility on someone else's shoulders.



Well, I hope they are fine for each other and make each other very happy in a good way. But to be honest I find it hard to believe that this is going to happen .. she is quite aggressive and was quite nasty to one of the people on the site just because she hadn't signed the guestbook when she was profile reading. The place wouldn't last a day if everyone behaved like that. But she can be q1uite aggressive and rude .. and, believe me, nowhere near as caring as she makes out she is. If he's as needy as he appears to be I think he's in for a shock. But, still, despite that, I hope that they do manage to work things out. They haven't met yet but hopefully talking over the net has let them get to understand each other very well ....................... though .... it doesn't look like it.



As I said .. people seem to have given up on their story now. I was rooting for them for quite a while .. then, slowly things didn't look quite right.



It is such a responsibility to put the whole of the responsibility of your life onto someone else when you're ill in the way he's doing in this situation. I think this is what's made people lose interest. Especially as they've never met. She has agreed to marry him already .. they've known each other on line for about a year. You know .. I couldn't've recovered from the op if u weren't here .. omly knowing you're around stops me from going into deep, deep depression about my illness.



And now this I don't want you but I really need you.



Well, if what he's saying mirrors his situation then he really does .. but it seems way over the top to me. His illnesses aren't that bad but they are difficult right now. You wouldn't expect him to be thinking about death, for goodness sake, in connection with them.



It's all very strange,



Anyway we decided that it was nice to be wanted just as a friend or in a romantic relationship because someone liked you as a person and wanted you around because of that and not because they were needy to have you there.



I mean the whole point of the saying is to compliment the person in your life that you've chosen them to be in your life independently of how needy you are .. that's the whole point of it and it's meant to be a compliment .. he's said the opposite.



And the stuff saying he wouldn't'be got better if she hadn't been there .. well, figuratively speaking .. she didn't go over there .. they've not met yet. .. just is a load of crap .. it's not that type of illness at all.


Ah well .. I hope things sort themselves out for them .. or, rather, that they sort things out and it all works out.


I don't know but is maybe putting the possibility of your recovery .. it's not that type of illness anyway .. it's over dramatised .. onto someone you've never even met a little possessive.


I've been away from there for the main part .. not really interested anymore. I can contact people off the site anyway and I'm happier doing that. Ha! I've even said to some people to write what they want in E's guestbook whereas I was totally against it before ... lol!!!


Hey .. why not. I was worried that they wouldn't be able to deal with the guvs etc .. but they've enough to deal with her if she tries anything and the guvs come in .. lol .. think I was worrying for nothing .. now that the groundwork's been done so to speak there's nothing to worry about. I sorted all that out .. so that they're holding a load of webshots etc and it's all been documented with dates already so there's no real problem.


They have loads of stuff .. unfortunately the two main friends deleted a lot .. better if they'd saved the lot I guess. There's a chance this could become a legal matter I guess .. depends what E's doing behind the scenes. Something's happened cause she's been using some pretty strong language .. with """"""'s but strong all the same .. something has happened. One lady thinks it's because someone has told E that people are saying that she's not she .. could be .. she'd normally write it on the other profile if it was about that .. but she can't cause she's said she's away in hospital ... lol!!!



But it is possible that she does know now .. one woman lied about having told lots of people .. that came out soon enough .. she said that she'd messaged everyone on her friends list about E. That is everyone in that gaming group .. I know of three people who didn't get to hear .. and two of them are very close indeed. This happened cause E PM'd them about something on their profiles pretending to be a journalist .. she was very rude ... and they didn't know that this new profile was E .. so the person who said she'd PM'd all these people was caught out .. or, at least I know .. she's the hope this is the best day of your life one. She's not E .. know someone who's spoken to both of them on the phone ... lol!!!


And one other bloke who's in the group didn't know either. Just found out by accident!!! The people I know well already knew and I haven't asked if they got a PM from this other woman too. But, with three she didn't tell, I guess it's safe to say she probably didn't send out the messages she said she had.


Oh, wor a tangled web we weave .. when something blab di blah di something to deceive. I don't know the actual saying .. but it's certainly getting very tangled.


Seems to be the night for these sort of sayings and modern folk type wisdom .. huh .. first with the wanting rather than needing one and then the tangled web. But there are some very tangled webs being woven there.


Some people have said not to believe anything the hope this is the best day of your life woman says. Trouble is what she's said about her life is so awful .. I wouldn't want to make a mistake even in these circumstances .. but it doesn't really change much cause I know what she's like and I'll just respond to what she's doing at the time .. the rest doesn't matter at all really .. it was a very strange joke .. if she made it .. for someone who'd been through her childhood to make. Well, for anyone to make but especially in these circumstances.


Not that I'll have much to do with her anyway now .. but still .. something's obviously up.


This one says she used to be a nurse. I was slightly surprized how she put that when she mentioned it too .. she'd said to this other woman that she nursed people .. when I told her about my illnesses she told me that she nursed the terminally ill .. it was just the change in phrasing that made me a little surprized .. it felt like she'd picked up on what I'd just told her. The other woman is almost 80. The one she told she was a geriatric nurse. But I didn't think that much of it then. I was cautious because other things had happened that had sounded warning bells starting a few months before when someone first introduced her to me and she seemed to be playing games .. we were then out of contact until the stuff with E really got going.

Anyway .. it's not that much to do with me now really.

I want to go and see who has friended me over at another site I'm on .. heard the ting downloading my mail and checked what it was and where from.

Ha haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!! No, that's that site!!! Actually there are some very nice people on it .. that's just a few out 9f 100s of thousands of people there .. and, regardless of what 1 woman said, it's not 99% of them oo r orrid .. it just feels like it some days.

Right off I go .............